Day 28

John Prine died last night. Marc told me right as I was getting ready for bed. The tears just started rolling. We laid side by side in our bed, hand in hand, listening to our favorite songs. I think I cried myself to sleep. An absolute legend. Equal parts sweet and silly, smart and good. Just the kind of person you’d name your baby after.

I woke up stiff and sad and sore. Cried some more. I don’t know I guess it all just came to the surface. The grief. Not really the type to boo hoo a celebrity death. Marc was so sweet to me. He let me wake up gently. Made me coffee. Unloaded the dishwasher and made the boys scrambled eggs while I performed my almost ritualistic bed making chore. (It calms me. I swear.) Then he took the afternoon off. It was super warm–near record temps! And sunny. We worked and played in the backyard. I scrubbed out my flower pots. Never got those thunderstorms we were expecting last night but it appears they are firing up tonight. Mom just texted me that her and Granny’s power is out and the winds are howling there. Anyways, I burnt down the stick pile while chatting with my best girlfriend Jenny in Denver. Marc fed me tequila cocktails and I stayed out long enough to get an actual sunburn. Whoops! Used up all my aloe gel to make hand sanitizer. Double Whoops!

The other news of the day… Let’s see. Models are trending downward as to suggest we may only lose 60k American’s by August. Ok great. But that is still a colossal fuck up. Nearly 15K dead tonight. Emerging hotspots appear to be Baltimore, D.C., and Philly. Covid-19 is disproportionately killing black Americans. This is horrifying. It is infuriating that no one will come out and say that institutional racism is the cause. People of means that can afford to travel by air craft or cruise ship brought this disease everywhere with them while front line essential workers that don’t get paid a living wage or have access to quality healthcare pay the ultimate price. Which brings me to Bernie Sanders… he dropped out of the presidential race so it appears Joe Biden will be our nominee. I don’t have the mental bandwidth available to even scratch the surface on this topic tonight so I’ll leave it there.

Sorry if this post feels like a downer. I’m feeling way down. In a state of mourning. But shout out to husband who literally did everything he could think of to lift my spirits today. He really helped me out and I’m so glad to quarantined with him.